Welcome Home
by ZombieJazz
Summary: Olivia continues to establish her family and learn how to navigate motherhood while still serving with SVU. There's lots of challenges ahead as she adjusts to the changes in her life, surmounts new situations and legal troubles for her and her adopted children, and tries to find some time and space for herself in it all too. This is the sequel to Hello, Goodbye.
1. Chapter 1

**Title: Welcome Home**

**Author: ZombieJazz**

**Fandom: Law & Order: SVU**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them. Law and Order SVU and its characters belong to Dick Wolf. The characters of Jack and Benji have been created and developed for the sake of this AU series.**

**Summary: Olivia continues to work at establishing her family and learning how to navigate motherhood while still serving with SVU. There's lots of challenges for her ahead as she adjusts to the changes in her life, surmounts new situations and legal troubles for her and her adopted children, and tries to find some time and space for herself in it all too. This is the sequel to Hello, Goodbye.**

**Author's Notes: This AU series is for SVU fans and readers who want Olivia to have something that resembles a more normal life outside of work and a family of her own - hopefully somewhat realistically within the canon of SVU. Most of the chapters will ultimately take place outside of the work environment, so there aren't going to be too many references to cases from the show. But this story would generally be starting in about Season 15 of the show. Please let me know what you think and if you distribute elsewhere.**

"How'd it go?" Nick asked as she returned to the squad room. Munch and Fin had held back. They'd both taken the verdict hard. They needed time to talk – nor not talk – and decompress before returning to the precinct.

Olivia shrugged. "She got off," she said and then muttered. "It was a boy. Not a rapist." She could see the way Nick was looking at her. Concern creased his brow. She sighed. "You know how we've talked about how having kids changes this job? How having a daughter changes the way you interact with cases?"

Nick nodded and returned a small shrug. "Yea," he mumbled.

"Boys change it too. Jack's changed it a lot for me. A lot of the times I see some of our perps and wonder how I can make sure he doesn't do anything stupid. How I can be sure he grew up knowing right from wrong and respecting women. How even though I know he's a good boy, how can I be sure he isn't going to end up like one of these men that walks through our squad room. And, I hate that I often end up thinking about him when dealing with perps. Worrying about him then. But this case …" she shook her head. "It was reminder just how much boys and young men can become victims too. How we can end up thinking of them as the perps. How so many aspects of society has trained us to fear them unless they look and act a certain way. My son wears the baggy clothes and the hoodies. He wanders around the streets after dark with his skateboard and headphones blaring in his ears. I'm sure he's ended up walking behind women in the dark and they're senses have perked up about him being there."

"He's not black or Hispanic," Nick offered.

Olivia sighed as she took a seat at her desk and looked to her computer, trying to distract herself from the thoughts going through her head.

"I know," she acknowledged. "It's just … he's been victimized before and sometimes I feel like … he has these traits in him that make that apparent."

She glanced at Nick and saw acknowledgement in his face. As many walls as Jack had around him, he also let his guard down in ways that didn't make sense because he wanted to fit in and wanted to be normal.

"Sometimes I worry he's going to be revictimized because of it," she said. "This case just … reminded me how easily that can happen. And how much managing any of it is really out of my control."

"He's 19, Liv," Nick said. "He's not exactly a little boy. He's not Ben. It's not your responsibility to manage it all at this point."

She sighed and looked at her partner. "He's not exactly a little boy," she agreed, "but he's not exactly a grown-up either. He still needs help and guidance to get there. And, he didn't have a man in his life during some pretty important years in his development. Some days that's what feels so dangerous about these kids anymore. All these college kids. Some days I feel like it's gotten worse over my time here. We have all these children in adults bodies, bombarded with adult things for years. Unlimited access to all of this filth and deviance at their fingertips that they don't even see that way half the time they're so desensitized to it. These smartphones and laptops and tablets. The kids are just always plugged in. SnapChat and Instagram and Twitter and Facebook. Sometimes I think they don't even see each other as people anymore. It's all just words and pixels on a screen. They don't know how to interact with people and society anymore. It's all just … something to Tweet about."

"Jack tweets?" Nick offered. She knew it was a small tease. He was trying to get her to calm down and distracted. But she wasn't sure she wanted to be.

She shrugged. "I don't know. I don't think so. I pay for his phone. So the rule is that I'm allowed to touch his phone. But he's more technologically literate than me. Benji's more technologically literate than me. You should see him when he gets his hands on my phone or Jack's Xbox. It's like he was born to do it."

Nick gave he a small nod. "Yeah. Zara's the same way," he acknowledged. "It's a little frightening."

Olivia sighed. "Yeah, exactly. So I've talked to him about Twitter and Facebook and Instagram and all of it. I've expressed my concerns – both as a parent and as a cop. He … humors me and listens. Sort of. But if he's signed up and just has it hidden on the phone. Or just does it from his laptop. I don't know. It's like you said. He's 19. I can only control him and impose rules on him so much."

"You can under your roof," Nick offered.

Olivia shrugged. "He doesn't live under my roof. He's just there on weekends. And you can only … badger them and discipline them so much before you're just pushing them away. And I don't want to do that either."

"Maybe camp will have made a lot of that stuff better?" Nick said.

"I hope so," Olivia said and started clicking into her email to see what she'd missed since the last time she checked it on her phone. Some days it felt like it was a never-ending stream being blasted out of a fire hose. "I know I'm glad that he's had a few months with out that phone and Internet at his fingertips. I'm hoping that … just being with other kids who share his interests and doing things he enjoys will have helped with some of the other things too."

"Not sure it has?"

She shrugged again. "It's hard to tell when I get to talk to him by phone and Skype for 15-20 minutes at a time and have to split that with Benji wanting to tell him about what every second of our thrilling lives has looked like since the last time we talked."

Nick offered her a small laugh at that and she shot him a smile.

"I think he's had a good time," she allowed. "I do hear pride and confidence in his voice when he's talked about the skate park project and some of the activities he's gotten to do there and responsibilities he's had. So … I'm hopeful that will come with him home and we'll be able to transfer and maintain it in his daily life."

"Hoping you end up with a man coming home rather than a boy?"

Olivia snorted and rolled her eyes. "I didn't place that lofty of responsibility on Skate Camp. Maybe if I'd sent him to Boot Camp for the summer. But that likely would've traumatized him. Burly men screaming at him? I don't think that would've helped his progress."

Nick gave her another little smile.

She nodded at her screen. "His ears must be burning." She saw Nick give her a questioning look. "An email just popped in from him." She clicked into it. "He sent some of his pictures and videos. You want to see?"

Nick shook his head at her with a touch of mocking but rolled his chair over. "Maybe he could sense you needed one of these today. You like getting them too much."

Olivia shrugged. "It's a nice break from the usual bullshit we're dealing with."

She scrolled through the photos slowly to let Nick take a look. By her standards she was moving a little fast, but she knew she'd go back and take a closer look at them when Nick wasn't looking over her shoulder.

The photos weren't too different from what he'd been sending her the rest of the summer. Photos of the lake and deer. Kids zipping through different parts of the skate park they had at the camp. Cabins and campfires and usually smiling faces or silly poses. She knew that one of the smiling faces and thumbs up or whatever hand signs where being shot at the camera was coming from whoever the visiting 'pro' was that week – but there were only a handful of professional skateboarder that Olivia could identify by face and she didn't appear as though Tony Hawk had spent anytime at Skate Camp that summer. What she could recognize were the sunrises and sunsets and night skies. The photos of the murals and artwork and decals painted on skateboard decks and the sides of ramps and cabins. Projects that it looked like Jack had become just as involved in helping with as he had with building and maintaining the skate park. But out of all the pictures Jack had sent over the summer, he was usually the photographer and he was rarely in the shots. She hoped that he had a collection of photos of himself too, though, and that maybe he just hadn't thought she'd be interested in looking at him. She wanted him to have happy memories he could hold on to. She thought he did. She got the sense he'd connected with some of the other counselors and that he was well-liked among the campers. At least that was her hope.

She reached the video and clicked on it to begin to play. Sometimes the videos were silly. One time Jack had sent one of him and another counselor doing a skit at the campfire. The video was dark but she could hear his voice and see his silhouetted figure – and he really was being funny. Another time he'd sent her video of the kids being pushed down the dock and launched into the lake, some of them doing harrowing flips and turns in the air before falling into the water. When Jack had gone he'd managed to spread his arms out like superman while flying through the air. It looked pretty impressive until he hit the water in a giant belly flop. The camera had then shown how red his chest was when he'd gotten out of the lake with other kids pointing at it and laughing. There was random bits of kids making skateboards and learning to play guitar and rubbing sticks together to start a fire. Some showed boys and girls ranging from ages looking like they shouldn't even be allowed to be at a sleep-away camp yet to teenagers that had fuller beards than what her 19-year-old son could grow on his baby face. The kids rolled through the different ramps and courses at the camp executing tricks with ease or entirely wiping out to cheers and "ooooooh" "ouch!" "gnarly" in the background. Kids laying next to fun boxes and rails and banks and little inclines as skaters flew over top of them. In each one her son had the kids smiling and waving at the camera and saying "Hi Mom" before doing their bone crunching and bruising feats (usually without any visibly injuries occurring). She wasn't sure the kids knew they were saying hi to her or they thought they were waving to their own mothers. There was even a video of Jack flying down the zip line and dangling from the camp's rope course high above the ground based on the shots he insisted on taking from his harness.

But the one that had really made her stomach turn was the clip of a hike that looked calm and pretty enough. It had ended at a fairly spectacular waterfall – or at least watersteps and rockslides – formation that apparently the counseling staff took great pleasure in hiking out to and jumping off of on their days off. She could've done without having to watch that. She thought her heart had nearly jumped up her throat as she realized what her son was about to do and then had watched the shaky camera as he made his drop and then the extended bubbles of the rushing water on the video until he finally popped back up to the surface and she could hear his voice again. Logically she knew he was obviously fine – he was sending her the video. But the mother's mind was cursing that these kids were doing this. It was just asking for someone to get hurt or die. She'd expressed that to him in a scolding email and again the next time she talked to him. She stopped getting as interesting of videos after that. Instead they were things like this, which she supposed was interesting in its own right but not quite as fun to watch – at least for her.

The camera mounted to the front of a skateboard, she got a foot-level view of the skater navigating their deck through the skate park. She assumed the skater was Jack. And, she assumed that because the camera was strapped to the nose of the skateboard, he wasn't attempting any tricks beyond what she recognized as a couple of ollies and one grind across a ledge. But there was none of his usual fancy foot work. The balance was likely off with the extra bulk on the skateboard. She was actually sort of glad he wasn't trying tricks. As heavy duty as the camera she bought him was, she wasn't sure it would endure a failed kickflip or being landed on, run over by wheels or sent skidding down a ramp. So instead she just got a bumpy view of a skateboard's nose riding around a park.

"That the park thing he built?" Nick asked.

Olivia shrugged. "I assume so."

"Can't see much of it from this angle," he muttered.

She scrolled back up, leaving the video running – she didn't think they'd be missing much. "Well, that's it too," she said and jabbed her finger at the one photo. "Or at least part of it."

Nick examined it, leaning a bit more forward in his chair. "Doesn't really look like a ramp, does it?" he asked after several seconds.

"It's a street course," she said. "It's not really supposed to have ramps. It has banks and rails," she added, pointing again to some of the elements on the course that she could recognize. "And a snake run. Apparently that was really challenging to make when they were having to do it with wood."

Nick gave a little snort at her getting into the specifics and just gave her another look. She glanced at him but just gave him her own face and went back to looking at her son's photos before scrolling back down to watch the end of the video.

"What?" she said.

Nick shrugged. "Nothing." He watched the video for a moment too. "So are you excited about getting to see this thing?"

Olivia shrugged. "As excited as I can be about seeing a skateboard park."

Nick let out a real laugh at that and he looked at him again.

"I'm excited to see something that Jack's really proud of," she provided instead. "I know he's worked really hard on it."

Nick gave her a small nod. "So how many days are you spending out at the camp?"

Olivia made a small noise at that and let out a sigh. "Well, the family weekend is two nights. But I think we'll only be there for the one. I really don't know how Benji's going to handle flying across the country and then getting in a car for another two hours to drive to this place. So I'll see how he's doing. How I'm doing. I think we'll likely just stay in a hotel that night and drive out in the morning."

"This camp's only two hours from L.A.?" Nick asked surprised.

"Fresno," she said flatly.

Nick examined her for a moment as he thought on that. "That direct?"

Olivia shook her head. "I wish. We've got a layover in L.A."

Nick made a face. "That is going to be a long day."

She nodded. "I know. I just hope Benji likes the plane and doesn't throw a fit when we have to catch the connection and not want to get back on. And I just hope I can get through the airport fast enough too."

"LAX?" Nick asked. She nodded. "They're always delayed."

She sighed but shrugged. "That might work in our favor. The layover is only an hour and I thought we'd likely end up missing our connection and having to wait anyways."

"That is going to be a long day," Nick repeated again.

Olivia shrugged. "It was going to be just as long if we took the stop over in Denver or Salt Lake."

Nick made a face at those choice too. "You might've been better just driving from L.A.," he suggested.

"I thought about that," she acknowledged. "But it'd be five hours then and I really didn't want to do that."

Nick snorted like that was a ridiculous statement given what he knew of the rest of her travel plans. "But you're driving back down and flying out of LAX on the way back?"

"San Diego," she said flatly. She wasn't sure she wanted to hear Nick's commentary on vacations with preschoolers again. Clearly he'd had a bad experience with Zara.

"So you've really decided to do that?" he asked at her with some disbelief in a tone that she still almost related to Elliot. That he knew better tone and she was just out of her league and should listen to him if she knew what was good for her. She hated that tone. "You're going to drive the whole coast?"

She nodded without even looking at him. "That's the plan," was all she provided.

"You're brave," he said. "To do that with a four-year-old."

"I'm sure other people have done it with a four-year-old and survived," she said flippantly. For what she dealt with daily on the job, she was pretty sure she could handle her little boy in a car.

"Maybe four-year-olds who are used to car rides," Nick said – still in that tone.

"He's going to be fine, Nick," she groaned at him. "It's not like I'm going to have him in the car for hours on end. There's lots of things I'd like to stop and do. We aren't on a schedule. We'll get there when we get there. I'll see how the boys are doing and just … play it by ear."

"Zara whines just to DC," he provided.

"Benji is not Zara," she said. She liked Nick's daughter a lot. But she could be a little high maintenance. And, she'd never say it to Nick, but with the separation and the animosity between her parents, they'd been catering to her as they tried to win her affections and to create some sort of happiness in all the chaos. The result though was that the little girl was becoming a little spoiled. Even in the limited amount of time Olivia interacted with her, she saw it. She'd definitely seen it the couple times over the summer they'd gotten the kids together to play. Nick doted on her in a way that was a little too accommodating as far as Olivia was concerned. Or at the very least, it was a very different parenting style than she'd adopted with her boys. And, it wasn't one she particularly wanted to emulate. "And I've bought him a few surprises to keep him entertained and distracted on the flight and in the car. He's going to be fine."

"Unless those things involve a screen, you are going to be hearing 'Are we there yet?' every five minutes," he said. "Getting Zara that fucking iPad mini has been the only thing that has made ferrying her back-and-forth to Maria's bearable."

Olivia snorted and gave him a look. "He's four. He's not getting an iPad mini. He doesn't need screen time to be distracted. And we've been practicing. He's going to be fine," she stressed again in an attempt to end it.

"Practicing?" Nick said with some humor. "To the Catskills and Montauk?"

"Both are more than three hour trips," Olivia pressed back to him, "and he was fine. Benji is better behaved than you think."

"He sure doesn't sit still when he's in here," Nick said.

Olivia sighed. "It's different when he's transfixed by something. The train. The subway. The bus. I'm sure a plane. He's going to be fine."

"And a car?"

"He was fine in a car when we went to the Catskills. And, if he's having trouble sitting still in the car, we'll get out of the car," she said again. "We're driving a tourist route, Nick. There's things to stop and see and do. There's things I want to see and do. And for the boys to see and do."

Nick just gave her a look like she was still setting herself up for disaster.

"Nick," she sighed and held up her hand to just get him to stop. "I couldn't tell you the last time I took vacation time … and the last time I took vacation days and actually went on a vacation?" She shook her head. "Neither of the boys have ever been on a vacation. I'm looking forward to this. I'm looking forward to sharing it with them. They are going to be fine because they are looking forward to it too. And if they're not – tell me 'I told you so' when I get back. I don't want to hear anymore about it now. The flight and the car are booked. I'm doing this. The Pacific Coast Highway is what my first family vacation is going to look like. OK?"

_**Just a note for fans of the Olivia/WIll/Noah AU, I posted a O/S (that might turn into a two-shot) called Therapy. it deals with the therapist scene from Wednesday's Child. It has some Rollercoaster spoilers in it. But I've gone in and italics the paragraphs with the main spoilers, so you should still be able to mostly enjoy the story without being spoiled, if you're worried about that and still want to check it out.**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Title: Welcome Home**

**Author: ZombieJazz**

**Fandom: Law & Order: SVU**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them. Law and Order SVU and its characters belong to Dick Wolf. The characters of Jack and Benji have been created and developed for the sake of this AU series.**

**Summary: Olivia continues to work at establishing her family and learning how to navigate motherhood while still serving with SVU. There's lots of challenges for her ahead as she adjusts to the changes in her life, surmounts new situations and legal troubles for her and her adopted children, and tries to find some time and space for herself in it all too. This is the sequel to Hello, Goodbye.**

**Author's Notes: This AU series is for SVU fans and readers who want Olivia to have something that resembles a more normal life outside of work and a family of her own - hopefully somewhat realistically within the canon of SVU. Most of the chapters will ultimately take place outside of the work environment, so there aren't going to be too many references to cases from the show. But this story would generally be starting in about Season 15 of the show. Please let me know what you think and if you distribute elsewhere.**

Alex glanced around the apartment as she came into the living room space. It looked like a full-blown tornado had gone through it. She was used to seeing Olivia's apartment in a state of disarray anymore. But she'd never seen it quite this bad.

She glanced back over her shoulder and gave Liv a look and the other woman sighed.

"I know," she said. "There's just too much going on lately."

Alex gave her another small look but resisted making a comment. In a way she did agree – there was far too much going on. If anything, Alex had pretty much felt like Liv had been in a perpetual state of motion since Jack had left for his summer camp placement. She knew part of that was to keep Ben engaged and distracted from the fact his uncle was on the other side of the country. Another part of it had been that SVU had managed to catch several cases that involved children that summer and those cases invariably meant that Olivia threw herself head first into them. If anything, Alex felt like the woman needed a vacation before this vacation she was going on – and she was even more likely to need one after she got back.

Alex just moved over to the couch, though, restraining herself from saying anything about that. But there wasn't anywhere to sit down. She gestured at it.

"Is there a reason your couch looks like an aisle at Staples?"

"Sorry," Olivia sighed again and bent and managed to scoop it all up in one go, walking to the dining room table and letting it all clatter into a bigger mess there. "It's Benji's standard supply list. I was just making sure I had everything."

Alex raised her eyebrow at that comment. "He needs that much stuff for kindergarten?" she asked as she managed to get to take a seat on the couch.

Olivia shrugged. "Apparently," she said with a tone that indicated she felt about the same away about it. "And, that's not even everything. They want all sorts of toiletries that I haven't had the chance to go and get yet."

"Toiletries?" Alex said. "Aren't these kids barely potty trained?"

Olivia shook her head and bent and grabbed a piece of paper off the coffee table and handed it to her. "Every size Ziploc bag imaginable."

Alex examined the list. "I don't recall every needing Ziploc bags in kindergarten or the rest of my rather lengthy academic career. To pack my lunch, yes. To learn, no."

Olivia allowed her a small smile at that. "Kleenex, paper towels, band-aids, soap …"

"Soap? Toilet paper?" Alex said in some disbelief. "There's a bigger problem if our schools than I thought if children now have to bring in their own soap and toilet paper." She looked at the list again. "What exactly is the difference between disinfectant wipes and baby wipes?"

"Ahh …" Olivia said and looked over her school at the paper. "I think one is to wipe the kids and the other one is to wipe tables. Maybe…"

Alex shook her head. "This is ridiculous," she said and put the paper back on the table in some disbelief.

"Yeah, I know," Olivia muttered. "I'm going to have to get a cab … or a wagon … to drag all this crap in on his first day."

"You should've done private school," Alex said flatly. "You'd be paying enough that you wouldn't be paying of this stuff too."

"I don't know about that," Olivia shook her head. "Besides, I can't afford private school."

Alex gave her a look. She had an idea what NYPD wages were and knew Olivia had received a notable raise with her new rank.

Olivia just returned the look, though. "We'd be living way too hand-to-mouth if I had to pay those fees – or I'd be draining his college fund."

"He has a college fund?" Alex put back to her.

Olivia snorted. "Yeah. It's called my savings account."

Alex gave her a small smile at that. She knew that right now Olivia was just plain old Mommy to Ben but she hoped that one day when he was older he'd realize just how much he'd lucked up with where he'd landed. He was going to have a nice childhood and every opportunity afforded to him that his mother could manage. He'd be cared for and loved and a little spoiled. Lots of sacrifices and adjustments would be made for him to make sure he got all the things he needed – and likely most of the things he wanted too to a point. He was a lucky little boy.

"You might want to set up something a little more official than that," Alex suggested a little jokingly but with an underlying seriousness. "Get some real interest generated."

Olivia nodded. "Yeah. I'm going to meet with my financial advisor in September and reassess some things given the new developments in my life. Need to look at Jack too. He wants to do his masters. Or needs to do it for what he wants to do. … Or something."

Alex gave her another look. "You're going to pay for Jack's education too?"

Olivia sighed from where she'd started folding a basket of laundry. "I don't know. I might help. Maybe. It's still a few years away. He'll probably be able to get some financial support and even another scholarship. Or he may even decide he doesn't want to do the masters. Who knows. I just want to get a more realistic perspective of what I can and can't think about doing with my money now that things are starting to settle down."

Alex gave another glance around the chaotic apartment. "Things look real settled," she commented drily.

Olivia gave her an annoyed look but just said, "Packing has been a nightmare."

"Did I miss some memo that you're actually moving to California?"

Olivia snorted at her. "I just don't know what to take," she said.

Alex raised her eyebrow and leaned and snagged some of the clothes out of the basket her friend was working on to fold herself now. "You're going to California, Olivia, not the Sahara Desert. I'm pretty sure you'll be able to get anything you don't bring but suddenly need there."

Olivia rolled her eyes.

Alex ignored it and instead held up the tshirt she had. It was plastered with the Rescue Bots. She gave Liv a smile. Benji was beyond doted on and spoiled.

She nodded. "Yeah, that one's a take," she said and pointed at a pile on the far side of the table. Alex finished folding it and placed it on top.

"Little boy clothes can be pretty cute," she commented as she shook out the next item from the pile and worked at folding it.

"They get a lot less cute when you're doing laundry every second day – if you're lucky – and it all ends up in the same scrunched up ball in his drawer or on the floor no matter how nicely you fold it for him," Olivia said without even looking up from what she was doing. She seemed to have developed a technique for folding that barely even looked like folding. It was more she held it in the air and by the time she shook it out and let it drop to the table it'd managed to have meshed into a perfect square. Alex would like to know that trick. Though, she wasn't sure if she wanted to know it if it meant that she needed to invest in having two boys and endless loads of laundry to do.

"Have you done his back-to-school clothes shopping yet?" she asked casually.

Olivia looked up at that and gave a small shake of her head. "I had wanted to get it done before we left. It just didn't happen. We'll still have some time when we get back."

Alex eyed her for a moment. "You know you need to at least have him a new outfit for his first day," she said. "It's like a right of passage – and think about your photos of his first day of school. Do you really want him wearing this?" She held up a Mets tshirt.

Olivia glanced at her and just smiled. "I kind of like that one. Take," she said and pointed at the pile.

"You're setting him up for teasing. Cheering for the Mets," Alex teased her and put it where requested.

"Cragen bought it for him," Olivia said flatly.

Alex looked up at her again. "Cragen's buying him clothes now?"

Olivia shrugged. "You buy clothes for him all the time."

"Because in the limited amount of free time I have, I've been known to shop."

Olivia raised her eyebrow. "In the toddler boys' section?" Alex offered no comment to that. "I'm sure Cragen just picked it up when he was out at a game."

"In other words he spent an arm and a leg on it," Alex told her.

Olivia shrugged. "It's his way of trying to show interest in the boys and be supportive."

Alex just offered a nod. She wasn't going to argue that point. She knew that Olivia had been appreciating just how supportive her squad had been being since Benji had become a part of her life – but particularly that summer when everyone knew her extra set of hands was away. Alex was glad for that too. And, she was even gladder that Olivia (for the most part) seemed to be accepting the help and support. She wasn't sure how Liv would manage to be doing any of this – her job, being a single mom – without letting herself take the help.

"Do you want to leave me a list?" Alex offered. "I can go and pick up some of the clothes for him so you don't have to when you get back."

Even though Olivia was trying to make it sound like she had a lot of time when she got back from her holiday, the reality was that she didn't. There'd be barely a week before the boys were back in school. She'd be trying to catch up on work, trying to get Jack moved back into the dorms, trying to calm Ben's anxieties about starting school. She wasn't exactly going to have a lot of time to be battling the crowds for back-to-school shopping.

The detective looked up like she was actually considering it but then shook her head with another sigh. "No but thank you. I just haven't decided how I want to approach it yet. It might make more sense to get him some stuff that's a little bigger and just let him grow into it. Hopefully that way whatever I buy him at least makes it through the school year. But I'll need him with me to do that."

Alex nodded. "Because Ben's very co-operative about trying things on," she said with some sarcasm.

Olivia sighed. "That's part of the reason I've been putting it off."

"You realize you could just buy multiple sizes and bring them home to have a stand-off with him here?" Alex suggested.

She nodded. "I thought of that but then I went into a store on my lunch break and decided there was no way I was going to deal with those lines at every store I shop at twice. You think in here looks bad – you should see what moms on a back-to-school shopping mission do to the children's clothing department."

Alex gave her a small smile. "Worse than a sample sale?"

"It was chaos, Alex," she said. "I might as well have been on riot duty."

Alex allowed a small laugh at that and shook her head.

"Nick keeps telling me about all these sales. Go here for this. Go there for that. This is $5 today and this is $20 and this brand and that brand. It's driving me crazy," she said. "I don't know how he manages to keep track of it or get out to any of it."

"Well, he's got a daughter who's name literally means princess – so I'm imagining the first day of school outfit is pretty important," Alex said.

Olivia gave her a look. "She's going into Grade One."

"Have you met Zara?" Alex put back to her and Olivia did laugh.

Alex had met Nick's daughter just once that summer while she'd taken up an invitation to meet up with Olivia and Ben. It'd turned out that the meet-up was actually a playdate that Liv had arranged with Nick and his daughter. Even with not having to do anything beyond sitting and talking with the other adults while they monitored the little boy and little girl bicker and fight with each other far more than play – Alex had known without a doubt that Nick was in trouble. He thought he had his hands full with a daughter now – just wait until she hit her tweens and teens and truly became a little diva.

"And he's got his mom to send out on those kinds of missions," Alex suggested.

Olivia nodded and agreed, "Yeah," a little too softly, like she might be far too aware that she didn't have family to help. Or her mother wasn't around to see the family she'd managed to create. Though, from the little Alex did know about Olivia's mother she wasn't sure how helpful the woman would've been.

"You could just order online," Alex suggested. "Avoid the chaos."

Liv nodded again. "I'd still end up having to go in to return what doesn't fit or looks like shit – unless I wanted to pay shipping fees."

"Or you could leave me a list," Alex said again. "I can get you multiple sizes of everything."

Olivia gave her a small smile. "Even though I hate the chaos, I had been sort of looking forward to it. Little boy clothes are kind of cute, you know?"

Alex gave her a laugh for her effort to put that statement back to her. But she just reached and pulled the supply list closer to her. "Well, then at least let me go and pick up the rest of this nonsense so you don't have to worry about that."

Olivia nodded. "I'd appreciate that."

Alex gave the apartment another cursory glance. "I think you should let me come over while you're gone too and do some clean-up in here. You're going to hate walking back into a disaster zone after a holiday and with Jack in tow."

"It's not that bad," Olivia protested.

Alex gave her a look. "It's pretty bad."

Olivia sighed and looked around. "I was going to sort of clean it up as I went with finishing up the packing."

"That doesn't look like it's going so well," Alex said bluntly.

Olivia rolled her eyes. "Two hands," she said.

Alex held up her own. "Four right now." As she dropped them, though, her eyes fell on something else in the corner. "Did you buy a car seat?"

Olivia glanced behind her to where her eyes had fallen. "No specifically for this trip. But yes."

Alex raised an eyebrow.

Olivia rubbed at hers and looked away. "I'd bought it for when we went up to the Catskills."

"You mean to Brian's cabin," Alex said.

She really got a look for mentioning that name. It was off territory. Alex wasn't allowed to ask what was going on there – and Olivia hadn't said. Though, something was clearly going on. Olivia and Ben had twice gone up to Brian's cabin that summer and she knew that they'd been spending more time together than that. Alex had gone out to one of Ben's supposed 'soccer games' and Brian Cassidy had also shown up. It had been a little awkward – only because Olivia was clearly giving her looks that said not to comment on it. But it was also abundantly clear with how Ben interacted with the man it was someone he was used to seeing.

Alex, though, wasn't entirely sure what was going on though. There were no public displays of affection between the two to suggest that they were anything other than friends. That he was just another person who'd decided to support Olivia that summer and in managing her newfound motherhood and family. Still, Alex couldn't help but wonder if they were friends with benefits or even something a little more. Part of her sort of wished there was a bit more up-front clarity about what exactly it was because she knew that Jack was definitely going to want and need that when he arrived back in the city.

"With how much it was going to cost to rent one," Olivia added, now clearly pushing to change topics, "I might as well buy another one. It's really going to be cheaper just to pay the baggage fee to take it out there with us."

Alex allowed a small nod at that logic. "So how are you going to the airport?" she asked, though. "Is Brian going to give you a lift? It looks like you're going to have a lot of stuff."

Olivia shot her another look. "No that much. Two suitcases and the car seat. A carry-on with his junk in it to feed and entertain him on the plane."

Alex shrugged. "Still a lot for one person to handle."

Olivia shook her head and stood from her place on the floor where she'd been folding and disappeared down the hall only to return with one of the said suitcases and starting to work at piling some of Ben's clothes into it.

"We'll likely just take a cab," she said without looking at her.

"Brian hasn't offered?"

Those daggers came again.

"It'd just likely be easier and cheaper if he drove you," Alex offered but she sighed and conceded. "OK, dropping it."

She'd been invited over to help pack and for a bit of a visit before they left. She would've preferred she got in a visit before Ben had gone to bed. But if that had happened, getting Ben to bed would've been a chore for Olivia and it definitely didn't look like she needed any more of those. It was best no to piss off the detective before she went away. She didn't exactly appear excited or calm about the pending vacation.

"So how are you doing?" Alex asked instead. "You don't seem that excited?"

Olivia let out another small sigh and gave her a look. "Nick's just been doing an Elliot lately."

Alex laughed out loud at that. "Have you expressed it to him on those terms?"

"He'd find that grossly insulting," Olivia put flatly.

Alex snorted. "He'd likely have reason to. What's he been doing?"

"Holier than thou," Olivia said. "Telling me how much of a disaster this trip is going to be."

Alex looked at her. She actually seemed genuinely hurt and concerned about whatever her partner had been spouting at her. Olivia met her eyes, though.

"You don't think this is going to be a disaster, do you?"

Alex examined her and considered that. She wasn't sure it would be a disaster. But she did think Olivia was brave. She could tell that the detective was tired from the summer and she wasn't sure how much of a break this trip was really going to be for her. Beyond that, though, Alex had been invited by Olivia to take a trip out to Montauk in the summer – so she'd gotten a bit of a first-hand look at what travelling with Ben actually looked like. In a single word: Exhausting.

It'd been a strange weekend. And it had been long. Alex had initially envisioned a weekend in the Hamptons. Sure, a very touristy area in a region that used to argue it wasn't even part of the Hamptons. But the Hamptons. She hadn't really considered how much having a little boy with them would fundamentally change what previous weekends she'd taken out on the beach had looked like. But it was definitely different.

Ben had hardly sat still the whole train ride and he just never shut up. That in itself was exhausting. Alex knew he did that. She knew how much restless energy he had and what a chatterbox he could be. But dealing with it for three hours versus three days were two very different things. She'd been amazed at how Olivia seemed to manage to carry on something that remotely resembled a conversation with her while still interacting with Ben's ramblings. Though, she suspected that Liv might've felt more like they were having more of a conversation than she'd actually had. There were so many interruptions that Alex had pretty much given up trying to talk.

It'd only gotten worse when they'd actually gotten to their hotel. The first night it had seemed like it had taken hours for Olivia to actually get Ben to sleep. The detective had seemed like she was still ready to go when that was done. She'd come out to their balcony with a bottle of wine, apparently ready to spend what was left of the evening sitting in the summer breeze drinking and chatting. But Alex had been so exhausted from even just listening to Ben and trying to keep up with him and Liv that she'd barely gotten through a glass before she excused herself to fall into bed. Olivia had seemed surprised but all Alex could think about was that she didn't know how she did this every day.

The trip too looked nothing like what 40-something single women should be doing on a weekend away. There hadn't bee shopping or sitting on a patio with wine or sangria, there wasn't laying on the beach reading, enjoying a meal that was far too over priced, or any social gathering of any kind. They'd gone to a petting zoo (A PETTING ZOO!) and played mini putt. They'd spent time at the beach but they'd also spent time at the playground and a skate park. Rather than enjoying sitting and doing nothing – they'd gone on a 'hike' that was supposedly suppose to yield seal sightings. When there hadn't been seal sightings there had been tears instead.

Then that didn't even get into the fact that Ben seemed constantly hungry. Of course it was hungry in the way that he wanted one grape or one cracker or one sip of water – every 10 minutes. But that was better when they actually sat down at the restaurants. There were no fancy restaurants that week. Their prime spot eating had been in a place called the Crabby Cowboy. Alex didn't need to see the menu to know that it wasn't going to be a meal to remember. Only it had turned out to be a meal to remember because after her and Olivia had settled on a steam pot to share – she'd decided to give her son a crab leg to gnaw on. Listening to Ben crunch and suck on the thing had been enough to turn Alex off the rest of her meal. Not that she'd been that excited about eating food with her hands in public in the first place – even if it was at a place called the Crabby Cowboy.

In essence, it really hadn't seemed like much of a holiday. She certainly didn't think it seemed very relaxing for Olivia. Not that Olivia had said anything to indicate that she was feeling exhausted or overwhelmed. If anything, she seemed to have things as under control as she always did. But it still left the idea of spending a holiday that would predominantly entail spending time in a car with Ben seem entirely unappealing to Alex.

"Well, you're in a car," Alex said, "if it's that bad …"

Olivia interrupted. "That's what I keep telling Nick. There's lots of pull-offs and towns and tourist sites."

"I was going to say hurl yourself off a cliff," Alex amended.

Olivia snorted at that and shook her head.

"I'm sure it will be fine," Alex said. "You'll have Jack to help."

"Hopefully," Olivia said.

"Have you told him about the trip yet?"

Olivia nodded but then shook her head and shrugged. "Yes and no. It's sort of a surprise. He knows we're driving down the coast back to L.A. but he doesn't know that we're going all the way down. That I've got the beach house rented."

Alex looked at her. "Don't think he'll be excited about that?"

She nodded. "I think he will be. But I think he'll be more excited if he doesn't have time to think about it and stew about it. If we just do it."

Alex allowed a small nod of acknowledgement at that. Jack could be a strange kid. But Olivia was likely right. He'd be in a stew about school and work and getting back to the city. She sort of hoped, though, that not giving Jack notice wouldn't blow up in her face. She trusted, though, that Olivia knew how to manage the teen. And, hopefully after the summer away how he handled some things would be approached a little more maturely.

"Does he know you're doing the Disney thing?"

Olivia shook her head. "I don't know if we're doing the Disney thing."

Alex looked at her. "You have to do the Disney thing. Ben's been telling me all summer how he's going to meet Buzz and Woody and … the red car."

"Lightening McQueen," Olivia provided.

"Lightening McQueen," Alex repeated flatly.

"I'm sure if I need to we'll be able to find people dressed as those things in front of Grauman's Theater."

"See, that just sounds gross not fun," Alex said.

Olivia sighed. "I'll just have to see how Jack's doing. Disneyland is supposed to be pretty ridiculously crowded and it will be hot. They might not be in a place where they can handle it."

"Olivia – you have to do the Disney thing," Alex said. "It will blow his little mind at this age. You won't get that chance again."

She shrugged. "We could always go back. Or to Florida."

"The Florida one is likely even more ridiculous. It's a world. Not a land."

Olivia allowed a small laugh at that and shrugged. "We'll see," she allowed.

"Olivia," Alex said, "those boys will be able to handle whatever you tell them they can handle. You've been waiting to get to do some of these things for years. Do them. Remember that it's your vacation too. Do things you want to do too. You deserve it. Even if Disneyland is on your list."

Olivia allowed a smile. "It's not Disneyland I want to see," she said. "It's Benji's face when he sees Lightening and Mater."

"So go see Lightening and Mater … whoever Mater is …"

"He's the tow truck," she said.

Alex shook her head. "You didn't need to clarify. Information I don't need to know."

"It's important information," Olivia contended.

Alex rolled her eyes. "Very."


	3. Chapter 3

**Title: Welcome Home**

**Author: ZombieJazz**

**Fandom: Law & Order: SVU**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them. Law and Order SVU and its characters belong to Dick Wolf. The characters of Jack and Benji have been created and developed for the sake of this AU series.**

**Summary: Olivia continues to work at establishing her family and learning how to navigate motherhood while still serving with SVU. There's lots of challenges for her ahead as she adjusts to the changes in her life, surmounts new situations and legal troubles for her and her adopted children, and tries to find some time and space for herself in it all too. This is the sequel to Hello, Goodbye.**

**Author's Notes: This AU series is for SVU fans and readers who want Olivia to have something that resembles a more normal life outside of work and a family of her own - hopefully somewhat realistically within the canon of SVU. Most of the chapters will ultimately take place outside of the work environment, so there aren't going to be too many references to cases from the show. But this story would generally be starting in about Season 15 of the show. Please let me know what you think and if you distribute elsewhere.**

"I just don't get why I'm not parking," Cassidy said to her.

She glanced at him from looking out the window as he worked on getting them to the departure gates.

"Because it's ridiculous to have to try to find a spot and pay for it for you to walk us to the door," she said again. "It's fine."

He gave her that look that he'd been giving her for most of the drive over. The one that clearly said it was her that he thought was being ridiculous.

"I was going to at least stay with you until you got checked in," he said.

"Brian – I'm fine," she said a bit more firmly.

"With all these bags and a car seat and a kid?" he put back to her.

"I'm pretty sure I've handled more complicated situations with bigger things at stake," she said.

He audibly sighed at that response but turned his attention on getting them pulled up to the curb for the quick drop off. That was what she preferred. She didn't want to make a production of this. Not for her. Not for him. And not for Benji. They'd hardly be gone two weeks.

Brian got out of the truck, switching off the engine. "I'll go find you a cart," he said flatly. "I'll be right back."

She just nodded and looked over her shoulder at Benji. He smiled broadly at her.

"We at the airport Mommy!" he declared.

It made her smile more. At least he was excited about the trip. He'd pretty much been excited from the moment she'd told him – which hadn't been too many days after Jack had left. It had saved some tears about when he'd seen his uncle again but had meant she'd spent almost three months being asked daily – sometimes hourly – when exactly it would be they'd be going to retrieve Jack. It'd gotten to the point that she'd put a countdown on the fridge for him and just told him to go look there. But that had meant that she was repeatedly told exactly how many days it would be until they'd see Jack. She got the impression that Benji would've loved to know the number of hours, minutes and seconds too.

"We are!" she agreed, though, with just as much enthusiasm.

As tiring as Benji's excitement had been over parts of the summer - as much as it meant that she needed to put in extra effort to not just keep him distracted from Jack's absence but also from their pending trip – she was looking forward to it too. It'd been years since she'd even tried to plan a holiday. She couldn't even pinpoint the last time she'd spent in a hotel that hadn't been work related. Planning this trip – trying to balance the interests of a four-year-old with a nineteen-year-old while trying to get in some things she'd like to see and do too – had been hard. But she thought she'd done it. Or at least she'd done enough research to have in her head where things were and what things they might all want to stop at. She figured she'd have to play some of it by ear. See how the boys were doing. See how she was doing. See what was interesting and what was a bust. But she'd also booked a couple things – including a beach house for them to spend the last several days of their holiday at. And, she just couldn't wait.

She wanted to see her son. She wanted to see both of their faces when her boys were reunited. She wanted to watch them enjoy their first holiday experience. She wanted to get to see the ocean and spend time on the beach and just enjoy some time as a family while they weren't dictated by her schedule and Jack's schedule and very soon Benji's school schedule. She wanted some time where she hoped she wasn't exhausted. Though, she wasn't sure that point would come true. She knew the experience would be tiring. She hoped that ending the trip on the beach might sort of help with that. Though, after spending some afternoons and evenings on the beach with Benji around the city, she wasn't sure how much that would play out too. Supervising him could be exhausting all unto itself. But hopefully Jack would help with that and wouldn't tire of his little brother too quickly. Hopefully he wouldn't want a break from small children after a summer of being surrounded by them.

She undid her seatbelt and got out of the car, opening the back door and pushing forward her seat to get access to her son. Cassidy had insisted on putting the child seat in the back and depositing Benji into it. She supposed he got points for actually caring about the safety of her child – but it did mean that now she had to figure out how to get Benji and the seat out of the car. At least it would be good practice for when she had to do it on her own when she picked up the rental car. It wasn't until Brian was working on getting the thing into his truck that morning that she'd realized that it had been him who'd done it when they'd gone up to his cabin too. So she'd pushed him aside and tried to do it herself. Though, he'd ended up having to talk her through a couple of the steps – and then had ended up pushing past her and tightening the thing even more into place with a brute force that she'd never quite have. She hoped she'd be able to get it in place enough for the drive up to Jack's camp at least. Then she could recruit his brute force to make sure it was really secure.

"How you doing there?" she heard behind her and just nodded.

She managed to get Benji's belts undo while he was already yapping at her at about going on the plane and going to California and skateboarding and the ocean and Jack. It was the never-ending topic of conversation. She was sure everyone around them was sick of hearing about it too. She lifted him out by the armpits and deposited him on the ground next to Cassidy and turned back to working on getting the seat out now.

She could feel his eyes still watching her and probably wanting to push in and do it himself but he apparently managed to restrain himself.

"Guard the cart, Big Man," he said. "I'll grab your bags."

"It like a scooter," she heard Benji rambling and out of the corner of her eye saw him starting to push it.

She turned around. "Benj – do not push it. You don't want to hit anyone. … Or Brian's car."

"It a truck, Mommy," he said and moved, this time to stand on it like a scooter.

She straightened and put her hand on the luggage cart. "Benjamin, do not stand on it either," she said more sternly.

He looked at her with big eyes that looked a little sad. He always did that when she said 'Benjamin' – unless it was at his bedtime tuck-in.

She sighed. She wasn't bad at him. She just wanted to get out of the area as quickly as possible. Technically it wasn't supposed to be much more than a kiss-and-go slot. She could see the traffic officers already eyeing them and they hadn't even been there two minutes. But the area definitely wasn't designed for off-loading a pre-schooler and a woman who'd never travelled with one before. That was likely why Cassidy had wanted to park. But it was also exactly why she didn't want him to park. She wanted to do this on her own. Her sons. Her family. Her trip.

"I just don't want you to hurt yourself," she said. "Just …" she pointed back near the handle. "Stand there."

"OK, Big Man," Brian said, again having emerged from the rear of his pick-up with their two suitcases in tow. He dropped them on the ground and hoisted Benji up. "Let's put you in for a ride."

Brian started to maneuver her son around, trying to get his legs into the holes of the seat on the luggage cart, but when Benji realized what he was doing, he started to kick.

"Buy-in!" he protested. "I not a baby!"

Olivia looked again as she finally managed to get the seat out of place. "It's fine," she told Brian. "Just put him down."

Brian gave her a look. "It was busy in there," he said. "You've only got two hands."

She rolled her eyes. "One for him and one for the cart. Put him down."

Brian shrugged and put the boy's feet back on the ground. Benji huddled against her at that and gave Cassidy a dirty look. He ignored it, though, and just took the car seat from her and put it onto the cart, piling the two suitcases behind it.

He gave her a small smile at that. "All set," he said in his typical emotionless manner.

Olivia returned. "Thanks, Bri."

He just nodded and flipped the passenger seat back into place and closed the side compartment.

"So have a good trip," he said.

"We will," she said and stepped in, giving him a loose one-armed hug that he returned. "See you in a couple weeks."

But whatever that hug was or wasn't was immediately halted. "I TELLIN' PEEDG!" Benji yelled at them.

She looked down to see him pointing his finger accusingly. She snorted at it and rubbed her eyebrow. She wasn't sure what to say. Sometimes she felt like responding to any of it would only egg Benji on further – whereas if she just ignored it, by the time Benji talked to his brother next, he'd have far more interesting and important things to tell Jack.

But it'd been like that all summer. She wasn't sure if Jack had put some bug in Benji's ear about reporting back to him on any interactions her and Cassidy had while he was gone or if the little boy had just picked up on Jack's uneasiness about their relationship. It wasn't a secret, though. Both times she had taken invitations to go to Brian's cabin for the weekend, she'd let Jack know. And, there had been several other interactions that her and Benji had had with Brian throughout the summer that Benji had reported back to Jack on. Though, she didn't get the sense that any of them had been maliciously. Benji had just been excited about their outing and having a play-mate. A grown-up playmate who a lot of the time seemed to have a mentality that made him about Benji's age.

Olivia actually thought that Cassidy might just like that he didn't need to hold conversations of any sort of substance with Benji. With the time they'd been spending together, she'd definitely realized that Brian wasn't much of a conversationalist. It was funny because she remembered him being rather talkative back when they were young detectives. Not that she'd ever thought he had much of substance to say back then and a lot of what had come out of his mouth had annoyed her. But it was almost like he'd just taught himself to shut up. Brain seemed perfectly content to just sit with her and watch Benji while he played on a playground or ran around as his soccer practice. Or sit on her couch and drink beer while watching a weekend ball game – if he was lucky – or Rescue Bots or a Disney movie, if he wasn't.

At first Olivia had found it a little strange to be spending time with him but to not actually be doing much in the way of speaking. But as a visit (or two or three) from him over the summer became part of their weekly staple, she'd started to just accept it. It was just nice to have some adult company and an extra hand, even if it was a silent one. Though, she could've done without the questioning looks (and occasional comments) that she got from Alex. And the all-out feeling like she had to hide it from Nick, lest he go off the handle about it. But there really wasn't much to hide or say about any of it. They weren't dating. At least she wouldn't call it that.

There'd been moments when that had been hard in the summer. Times at the cabin where they had alone time after Benji was in bed. Times at her apartment where he easily could've stayed into the evening. But he hadn't. And she hadn't made any move either – as much as part of her had screamed at her she should.

But there remained the fear that Benji might catch them – no matter the where or the when of it all. She wasn't sure how'd he react if he did: if he'd be scared or if he'd be confused or if he'd barely bat an eye. What she did know, though, was that he'd seen and experienced enough in his young life that she didn't want to be adding to that – however accidentally it might happen. She also just didn't want to have lied to Jack. She'd promised him that she'd let him know when she was dating again and that they'd talk about it. She was sticking to that.

Brian seemed to be respecting all of that too. He hadn't bugged her about it. It was like when they had that wayward kiss in the spring he said his final bit and now he was waiting for her to decide what she was going to do about. She hadn't really decided yet but he also hadn't really indicated he was giving up on the possibility yet either. He was still there. As far as she knew he wasn't seeing anyone else. And for the most part he seemed to be giving her physical space too. There'd been a few small slips – that she'd actually allowed – that seemed to suggest he was still interested. Sometimes as they were walking his hand would find hers. There'd been a few stray hugs and half hugs. Some small pecks on the cheek in hellos or goodbyes. And, one time at the cabin while they were sitting and looking at the fire after she'd gotten Benji to bed, his hand had wordlessly found its way to her knee. She'd let it sit there for several beats while her mind reeled – while she decided if she was going to wait for him to go farther or if she even wanted him to go farther. But then she'd taken his hand in hers and they'd just was silently sat there gazing at the flames.

There were moments that summer where she'd wondered exactly how dating Brian might work. What it would look like? If it could be possible? He was good company. He was good with Benji and Benji seemed to enjoy having him around. But Benji also enjoyed having Alex and Nick and Zara around. After he got to know someone and decided they weren't likely going to disappear from his life, he became her usually happy-go-lucky little boy around them. So she didn't necessarily think that Cassidy was getting any sort of special treatment. Still, though, they were kind of cute together. But a good boyfriend? A good long-term male presence for her boys? She wasn't so sure about that.

There were times she thought that it might just evolve into dating him, though. Because he was there. Because he was available. Because the boys knew him. Because she had needs. But that thought bothered her too. She knew that neither her nor Brian really wanted a fuck buddy in the long-term, even though that's sort of what they felt like they were moving towards. She suspected if Jack got the sense that that was what was going on that he'd be even more appalled than she told him that she was ready to have a life beyond mom and wanted to start dating again.

But considering all the things she'd pondered about with Brian. Considering the things she'd done with him in the past. Considering Benji had certainly been around while they'd held hands over the summer and that the little boy, himself, had flopped against Brian while watching TV or passed out after running like a crazy man in the park only for her to let Cassidy carry him for her. It was a little funny that out of all the things he could've accusingly pointed fingers at her about – it was this. An innocent goodbye hug that was barely even a hug.

"Yeah, you aren't telling Jack," Cassidy said when she hadn't reacted.

Benji nodded hard. "Yes. I tell Peedg."

Brain shook his head and dug his wallet out of his pocket. Olivia really rolled her eyes at that.

"Don't you dare," she said.

Brian didn't even look at her as he riffled through his bills. "What's the big deal?" he mumbled. "Buy him some food for the flight."

"I eat Skit-tells on the plane, Buy-in," Benji declared, already seemingly starting to forget what he was even supposed to be remembering.

"Oh yeah?" Brian muttered again and then glanced at her. "I've only got twenties," he said and handed a bill down to her little boy. Benji gazed at it big eyed. It was likely the most money he'd ever seen. Or at least the most he'd ever gotten to hold. "Don't tell Jack," he instructed seriously.

"That's great, Cass," Olivia rolled her eyes. "Now my four-year-old has $20 and my nineteen-year-old is STILL going to find out you touched me, you know?"

Brian gave her a serious look. "It was you that touched me," he contended. She rolled her eyes harder.

Benji looked up at him. "Buy-in? How many Rescue Bots this buy?"

"Ah, maybe one?" he suggested.

Benji shook his head hard at that statement. "DAT NOT ENOUGH!" he protested.

Olivia looked up at the sky for a moment – almost wishing she was on a plane on her own now, taking off on some tropical vacation far away. "Benj, you already have every Rescue Bot imaginable."

"NO!" he near yelled at her. "I do not have Whole-ist, Med-ix, Bades or Ax-ill!"

Part of her wanted to laugh. It wanted to smile. It wanted to be relieved. Her little boy who a year ago thought only rich kids had toys, who didn't think he was good enough to get present, who was afraid to open gifts – now had a rather extended wish list. Only it sounded more like a greedy-gumlets demand list to her in that moment.

She looked at him seriously. "Benji – you have enough Transformers," she told him sternly.

She didn't know how many more Transformers he could have. She felt like their apartment was full of them – and she feared his approaching birthday when she was sure more would be flooding his play space and her living room and floors. She wondered if she could ban anyone from giving him anymore.

But then Brian added: "There's no such thing as too many Transformers" and there went that idea. If he was still showing interest in them at the end of September, she was sure he'd be one of the culprits who'd be giving her son another one of those damn robots. She wouldn't put it passed Alex and Nick either.

"Yeah! There no such thing MOMMY FOX!" Benji nodded hard in agreement.

"OK, Big Man, so if you can afford two Rescue Bots, you won't tell Jack?" Brian asked, looking seriously into Benji's eyes.

Benji scrunched up his face in thought at that for a moment. "OK. Two Rescue Bots," he nodded.

Olivia let out a small laugh and shook her head. "This is going to really help you get your shield back, Bri," she said. "Bribing a pre-schooler."

"Almost a kindergartener," he said.

"YEAH! I ALMOST IN KIDER-GARDEN!" Benji said firmly.

The two of them, Olivia thought. Sometimes she couldn't win around them. It was almost worse than when Benji repeated anything that came out of Jack's mouth as gospel.

"But you got ahead and call IA on me if you want," he said drily. She just rolled her eyes and he looked back to her little boy. "OK, bud," he said. "I'll give you another twenty bucks if you don't tell Jack and you get into the cart for your ma."

Benji really scrunched up his face at that and shook his head hard.

"Com'on, Big Man," Brian said. "It's like a ride. Liv will push you fast."

Her little boy looked at her and seemed to consider it. "It a ride?"

"Sure," Brian suggested. "Somewhere between swings and skateboarding."

Benji thought about that another moment but then nodded in agreement and Brian again reached for him and this time managed to deposit him in the seat, Olivia helping to get his legs in place, semi-grateful that she wouldn't have to be keeping her eye on him and grabbing at him – at least for the moment.

"There. Good. Stay in there – and don't give your mom a hard time."

"I be good," Benji said but he was already kicking his feet and causing the cart to drift.

"OK. Don't move," Brian said a bit more firmly and grabbed at the cart with one hand while he handed the kid another bill with his other.

Benji looked at his new found fortune while Brian gave her a smug look, like he'd just solved all the world's problems on her behalf. But then her little boy looked right at the man.

"Buy-in? I tell Peedg after I spend these?" he asked with such innocence and seriousness.

Olivia let out a loud laugh and gave Brian a look. He just sighed.


End file.
